Sleeping is nice because youre not actually dead and youre not awake so its a win-win situation
It’s like being dead without the commitment.
an open relationship with death
death with benefits
cancerousmexicanfetusrapewhistle:
One time when I was little I ran away from home because I was upset but I just took left turns because I wasnt allowed to cross the street so I ended up back at home it was really embarrassing
the girl sitting next to me in class is wearing the same shirt as me in a different colour and we keep awkwardly looking at each other like do I say something or just sit here help
i said ‘nice shirt’ and she said ‘better than yours’ i’m done
(Source: brandfckingnew)
i don’t care how long it takes
sooner or later, my family will have to look out the window
(Source: eatsleepstrokesrepeat)
when people say nice things about you
my dad hid in the shower once with a jar jar binks mask and a knife just to scare me and got it on camera
”where do you wanna go to dinner?”
”i don’t care”
”ok”
“Oh, you’re straight? So is spaghetti until it gets hot. ;)”
Are you suggesting we boil heterosexuals
